The world is noisy right now. It's so damn noisy that it makes our inside voices run away. Like, "Eff it - they're not listening anyway, imma go chill til they're ready to hear it," the inside voices say.⠀⠀

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And it's true. I can’t hear her because I'm listening to text threads and news feeds and consuming alarming information at a pace that makes my chest feel tight and airy. ⠀⠀
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I can't find where she's gone, that inside voice, the one that usually tells me the truth. Tells me what to do next. ⠀⠀
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There are quiet and sacred things I do to invite that voice to speak up, to tell me the things I'm not able to see without her help. Like yoga and meditation and praying and reading and long showers and setting my phone in one spot and spending time in a different spot. Going outside. Good music. Dancing, moving my body. Resting. Creating. ⠀⠀

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There are things I do to purposely avoid her, too. I can't listen constantly. So I watch TV more than normal, spend money, work extra hard, stay "super busy, OMG just so busy", get sucked into social media, eat bean burritos from Taco Bell (no cheese, extra sauce thank you bye).⠀⠀
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Right now though, I wanna hear her. I need clarity. I need that voice to be like, "ok honeybaby, here's how we're gonna see this, and here's how we're gonna walk through it."⠀⠀
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Listening.⠀

xx, 

Allyssa